My Adult Life

Golden Jubilee

2007-01-27T18:42:00.000-05:00

It took the better part of a month, but I did it. I have lost 50 lbs!

This is the most I have lost in my life. The last time I was at this weight was in 2000. Seriously. And that was only after losing 25 lbs on a low carb (unsustainable) diet and tri-weekly trips to the university gym where I swam and lifted weights. Once I no longer had access to the gym, and once the bagels started calling my name again, my weight came back, rather quickly.

Fifty pounds. That's a third of what I wanted to lose. "Only" two-thirds to go.

Thank you, Weight Watchers, for helping me get my ass in gear.

Starting Weight: 304.4 lbs
Current Weight: 254.4 lbs
Weight Lost: 50 lbs

I have a goal, now that I know I can do this: 150 lbs. And that's going to be a muscular 150!

Happy New Year!

2007-01-06T18:40:00.000-05:00

Seasons greetings, diet fans!

I must admit that I didn't take as much care in my eating and exercising over the holidays as I should have. I went away for New Year's and barely kept track of my eating, hardly drank any water, and didn't do a lick of exercise.

So, when I got back home I knew I had to get serious. I kissed my 35 extra points goodbye and monitored myself strictly. No snacks at the office. No holiday cookies. I even cut down my coffee consumption in favor of green tea. (I need milk in my coffee and I'm not always willing to spend that extra point).

I also started walking in the evening for 30 minutes. I just walk around the block, over and over. I'm sure my neighbors think I'm strange. I thought I heard a teen from the drug house across the street call out "Fatso" during one of my nightly strolls, but that might be my own issues interfering with my hearing. (It's not always about me, after all. He could have been saying, "Is that so?" and I only heard the tail end of it. Besides, I am fat. So?)

I did not want to be one of the rueful gainers when I got back to WW this week. I already had to deal with the headshake of disappointment from the aged secretary last week when I gained back the magical 2.4 pounds I'd lost the week before (I insist that their scale was off. There is no way I'd lost that weight, and so there was no way I gained it back. I'd been hovering on a 260-lb plateau for three weeks). Lo and behold, my efforts paid off in 4.2-lb loss! Huzzah.

I'm starting the new year on a good note, and I hope the trend continues. I'm so very close to 50 lbs down now.

Starting Weight: 304.4 lbs
Current Weight: 256.6 lbs
Weight Lost: 47.8 lbs

Exciting New Find

2006-12-06T16:26:00.000-05:00

Okay, it's not very exciting. I tried shirataki noodles for the first time last night. In case you don't know, the noodles are made from Japanese yam and tofu. They are very low in calories and carbohydrates: a whole package is worth 1 WW point.

They're fairly slimy right out the package, and you have to rinse off the foul-smelling liquid well. (Seriously, the stuff smells like the codfish section of the local fruit stand). The noodles firm up with cooking, although I recommend you boil them in some kind of broth (I used chicken buillion) because in and of themselves, the noodles have no flavor. My attempt at a sort of alfredo sauce with a light Laughing Cow wedge was not unsuccessful. I look forward to experimenting with stronger accompaniements next time I feel for pasta.

Weigh in tonight. I don't expect to have lost any weight this week. I've been excercising almost every night, and haven't gone too deep into my extra points. But I feel bloated. So, I will look for other non-weight evidence of progress this week.

Long Time No Write

2006-12-05T16:22:00.000-05:00

I know, that is not an incredibly inventive title. It has been a while. I wonder why I lose interest in my blog so easily. I fear this is a symptom of my general condition: dilletantism.

It's not even that I've been doing poorly. Things have been going quite well. I've managed to stay on program and have achieved some significant progress. To whit:

1) A trip to the doctor's office (for the first time in years) revealed that my blood pressure is 110/70. Amazing. Until v. recently, I'd been on the borders of high blood pressure.

2) The walk across campus which used to leave me breathless and sweaty three months ago can now be accomplished without mini-breaks and panting. No need to pretend to be enthralled with the plantings and squirrel in an attempt to surreptitiously catch my breath.

3) The belt I bought is now too big, and does very little to help me hold up the even bigger pants I own. (The downside is that all the clothes I bought over the summer for my new job are now too big and I have hardly had the chance to wear them. New clothes are nice. Paying for new clothes, not so much, especially since I plan not to fit in them in a few more months anyway.)

4) The damn crotch-numbing exercise bike has gotten easier to ride, although it is by no means comfortable. I am not an athlete, by any stretch of the imagination, but I made an agreement with myself to ride for 20 minutes every day, and it's paying off.

5) I managed to lose weight over Thanksgiving. Yeah, willpower!

Starting Weight: 304.4 lbs.
Current Weight: 262.2 lbs.
Weight Lost: 42.2 lbs.

FORTY-TWO POUNDS!

250 by year's end seems more attainable now.

Four Steps Forward, Three Steps Back

2006-10-28T13:00:00.001-05:00

Oh, the PMS Tango! Last Tuesday I was up THREE POUNDS, nearly undoing my lovely 10% loss. Dreaded female troubles were the culprit, or so I hoped.

I went to Boston this past weekend, and walked all over the city for hours and hours. Surely walking the Freedom Trail counts as at least 5 points exercise, right? I also made fairly good food choices. Soup, vegetables, whole grain breads, chicken breast, granola bars raisin bran--these were my staples.

I was gratified to see my weight drop four pounds. I should go on vacation more often!

SW: 304.4 lbs
CW: 270.4 lbs
WL: 34 lbs

Goal: 50 lbs by the end of the year. 16 lbs to go!

The Hunger

2006-10-13T14:46:00.000-05:00

For the first time since starting this new program, I have been ravenously hungry this week. I really wanted to eat lots of pizza and grilled cheese. The great thing about the Flex Points system is that I can eat pizza and grilled cheese. I just cannot eat them both, at the end of the day, once I’ve already eaten all my allotted points for the day. And, I guess, that is the other good thing about the system: I have to plan my indulgence. I can’t eat everything I want whenever I want. Just having to write things down forces me to stop and take a look at what I’m doing. Because, unchecked, I can and will have an entire large pizza and chase it with a couple grilled cheese sandwiches. Because I am greedy.

The chilly weather heralds the arrival of the ultimate junk food: The Pumpkin Donut. I cannot wait for them to start at Dunkin Donuts. In fact, I don’t think I’ve eaten a donut since last pumpkin time. I will definitely set aside a few points for those.

My upper respiratory/sinus infection is forcing me to go to the doctor on Monday. I know my coworkers will be happy for me to stop sneezing, coughing, and snotting over everything. I will be happy to hear out of my left ear again.

I will also take advantage of my time with the doctor to get the gym forms filled out. I want to start using the gym at the college where I work, and I need a letter from my doctor saying I won’t stroke out on the elliptical machine. I am really pleased with my weight loss so far, but I’m also looking forward to doing some serious exercise. Muscles, here I come!

SW: 304.4 lbs
CW: 271.4 lbs
WL: 33 lbs

Goal: Still no ultimate goal weight, but I’d like to see 250 lbs by the end of the year.

Oh, My Lungs!

2006-09-26T20:22:00.000-05:00

This cold has turned into bronchitis, which makes everything difficult. Working out is impossible. Walking is impossible. Driving is barely possible, because the coughing fits sometimes make it hard to keep my eyes on the road.

Even eating is hard, because my appetite is unpredictable. I am hungry, but not often enough to eat my daily allotment of points out of the low calorie foods in my house. Thirty points is a whole lot of veggie burgers and light yoghurts. I cannot deal with the volume of food it would require. I guess it would be easier to eat a calorie laden meal, but the last thing I want, when I'm sick, is a big knot of food sitting in my stomach while I'm trying to sleep.

So, how do I get enough rest, eat enough to not lose too much weight, and maintain (or even augment) my weight loss this week when I cannot even breathe?

Milestone

2006-09-25T18:48:00.000-05:00

I reached my 10% goal today. On the one hand, I am proud, because this is the longest I have stuck with a "diet" and this is the most I have lost. On the other hand, I feel like a sham because I am sick this week and I always lose weight when I am sick. The challenge will be to continue to lose weight for the next weight in, even though I am too sick to work out.

My clothes are hanging off me today.

SW: 304.4
CW: 273.8
WL: 30.6

I haven't set my target weight. Right now my goal is the next 10% by Christmas.

What's the Rush?

2006-09-18T20:04:00.000-05:00

That was the theme of tonight's meeting. For me, it should have been, "Why the hate?"

It's been three weeks since I went to my usual Monday night meeting. I had to switch to Tuesday for a while because of Labor Day and some work obligations. In the meantime, an extremely annoying man joined the Monday night group. He monopolized the conversation, asking things like how to figure out how many points a grapefruit is worth. (Read the book they give you when you join and this and other similarly stupid questions will be answered!) I knew he was going to be tedious even before the meeting started because he went up to the only other man in the room, addressed him as "Big Guy," and then proceeded to brag about his workout.

Instead of groaning out loud and rolling my eyes whenever Mr. Odious spoke, however, I decided to be charitable. After all, we go to meetings because we don't have all the answers. We've discovered that we cannot do this weight loss thing by ourselves. So, maybe his obnoxia stems from insecurity. Maybe he doesn't know how to bond with others without measuring his diet/excercise dick.

So, in addition to working on my weight, I think I have to work on not judging others too harshly. Maybe.

Good news:

1) Riding the exercise bike has become significantly less uncomfortable, and I've been able to do it three days in a row.

2) The belt I bought two weeks ago because my pants kept falling down now must be worn on the fourth notch rather than the second.

3) I was able to start chipping away at some of my dissertation data last night.

SW: 304.4
CW: 279.8
WL: 24.6

Here We Go Again

2006-09-17T20:43:00.000-05:00

It has taken me a while to decide to resurrect this blog. It was sitting there, unupdated, rebuking me for neglecting it and the project which it documents. You see, a little over a year ago I stopped struggling. I gave in and watched my weight slowly increase to 304.4 lbs.

I was caught in a common pattern. My life wasn't going the way I wanted. I had not made any academic progress in over a year. I was unemployed, and then severely underemployed. I crashed my car. My kitchen ceiling caved in. Lots of things were going on that made me feel out of control. My weight and what I ate seemed the least of my problems.

But then things slowly began to change. It started with a new job. The new job meant financial stability. I was able to buy a new car. I can even afford the higher insurance rates I now pay, having crashed two cars in two years. I am able to pay my bills. I am by no means rich, but I no longer have to worry about every little penny.

The new job is also great because I am getting academic support. My new bosses have decided that I will be their first doctoral student and are giving me everything I require in order for me to finish. I am also taking a course on the Middle East, and the professor has joined the campaign to kick-start my dissertation. It's a little scary, but it's just what I need.

So, with two major areas of my life on track, this summer I took a hard look at where I was and where I wanted to be in the next two years. Morbidly obese was not part of the picture.

I realized that I cannot do it alone. I cannot do it online, either. I tried Ediets twice to absolutely no avail. I knew that I could not do a program where I'd have to pay for special food. Besides, the people in those commercials seemed obnoxious and over-tanned, and the women looked especially sluttly post-weight loss.

And so, I went to Weight Watchers. I do the Flex Points plan and go to meetings now. I have been going for 11 weeks. As of last week, I've lost 21.8 lbs. It's not dramatic, but so far,(and I may eat these words someday soon) it's also not extremely difficult. I haven't cheated, because there's almost no way I can cheat. I do have a very high daily point limit because I weigh so much, but many weeks go by and I don't use all my flex points.

Tomorrow evening is my weigh in.

SW: 304.4 lbs
CW: 282.6 lbs
WL: 21.6

Goal: I don't know what my ultimate weight goal is. Right now I'm just working on losing 10%.